Numb.

I had this vision, which led me here. A part of me keeps bothering. When or how it will ever feel that way again. The butterflies in the stomach, blossoms in my garden. Little things that make my day. Will it ever come again?

These nights come without permission, without answers..just questions. They say don't rush love, or it'll run away. Maybe it's true, but when will come the day?
It's too much, teach me how to contain. No more blossoms , no more butterflies. Did 'Spring' miss its train?

Oh but hey, you're the pretty one, they say. Don't worry there will come the day. When your heart skips a beat, and him sweeping your feet off the ground. Remember, keep not only heart but eyes open. Don't fall into the same hole, or make the same mistakes.

My my what I'd do to make it come true. The butterflies in the stomach, blossoms in my garden. Little things that make my day. Too cold right here, the sun's been shining there. Will 'Winter' soon walk away?

x

Everything has changed,

It's over. Finals is finally over. Can you believe that? Maybe you can, but I can't, yet.
Ran a movie marathon to spend this evening. I need some refreshment, some reality to kick me hard, this time to prove I'm not dreaming.
It's quite hard to believe it's finally happening.. one-third-of-a-year long of holidays. Do I really deserve this? I really hope so.

The last ten days have been my toughest edu life. In fact, I think the whole semester. I'm sure if you've been following my blog you'll know how frequently I've complained about uni life. Last ten days, though, were the hell-iest. You know that time when you were determined that giving up was not on the list, but there's merely a thin line that's separating you from it? There goes the worst moments. Like how I wish I could fast forward time, into like the one I am in now. Imagining myself writing this entry, elaborating into words how I exactly felt. It was sick.

I was warned, like I've always been, how the next stage of education life I was about to face is going to get more ugly. My sisters definitely knew it best. The start of my overseas education was remarkable though. The moment when I finally managed to tick that dream achievement off my list. Also, when I made some good friends along the journey that stay until today. However my life seems to take a turn with its new Audi and drove me somewhere- which now I recall- the infinity path. The name shall define it well.

They say during your toughest times you come to appreciate the happy ones. I don't know what will happen just yet, but I've decided to learn to make full use of each day that will be passing, for the rest of the holidays. The year 2012 is approaching an end too. Which means I'm going to survive another one, this time I can say hardly.

Closing off this blog post with the song from the adorable singer- yes imma Swiftie ;)

Remindęr

Sometimes, the only thing I need to remind myself is that everything that I put my effort into, is gonna be worth it in the end. It's a matter of time, really. Just like how spring comes after winter, how autumn cools the summer. Sometimes, I need to just work, wait and see. And remember to aim for the moon, cause even if I fall, I'll land among the stars.

Give it my best

So I volunteered for selling merchandise on Pink Ribbon Day yesterday, and it was surprisingly fun!
Unlike Daffodil Day, this time I sold a lot more stuff! I think reason being could be due to the location I'm working at, and/or the popularity of the fundraising.

This got me thinking about the concepts I've been learning at school:

1. Even the two 'brand's in the same organisation, can have different reaction from the public. Do we call it in the commerce term..image branding? 
2. The location of the 'store' makes big difference! The first time I was volunteering at a landmark in Sydney: Darling Harbour, where tourists are relatively more compared to locals on the working hours. Tourists may also not be familiar with the event and refuse to contribute, and they might not care much since it is not for their home country..? I choose to believe more on the first reasoning. Darling Harbour is indeed close to some offices, but not as many as in the Town Hall Station, where people also get off and on trains every minute. Higher chances to meet citizens who are supportive towards the familiar fundraising event ;)
3. Customer service plays a role! The more we enjoy volunteering for this cause, the more we seem 'approachable'.This can be seen through the conversation among members, the 'welcoming' atmosphere among the staffs which show 'friendliness' to others. The smiles we give away whenever they buy (or even not buy something).. oh and the marketing strategy, like the presentation of the merchandises (ie. the 'catchy' colours)! : )
4. Since the 'staff members' in this case are those who volunteer.. they may show greater job and organisation commitment. Working for 5 hours with short (sometimes even no) break as well as no monetary reward..shows the employee engagement in the organisation ;) Of course we are allowed to take breaks as long as we want but since this working is individual consent.. we might feel a little guilty, no? :p

Sorry if I confuse you with some of the commerce terms x) I'm practising to apply the management knowledge (I'm about to be tested) in the recall of that experience.. hehehe

By the way, finals is approaching very very soon.. and I better be well prepared by the time it's here. Wish me the luck and motivation I can get to nail this big thing? It's probably the most important 'exam' I have still got to face before the end of year. All possible fingers crossed xxxx

Thought I might also share today's happenings and inspiration:

Reminder

One of the many food trucks in 'Movable Feast' even tonight!

Food truck's hunt. yummmm ;B

I find this lovely <#3

Until next time then! xoxo

Come back to life

My first semester attending University is nearing an end. Time is crazy fast when you are having fun and stuffs to do all the time. One down, another to go.. another down, other to go.. the list is never empty.

I have just enrolled the courses for next semester. All thanks to my Indo peers who have started discussing the timetable of the same course we all are taking: Macroeconomics 1. So basically we want to be enrolled in the same tutorial, so we could meet more often. Each one of us is now taking own direction..some are considering to take similar majors, others like me, are partially on my own.

Life is getting more interesting since uni started. Looking back, all the issues in both social and education life still intrigue me today. I may have improved my learning style in Foundation Studies months ago, but in Uni I come back to where I used to be.. the slacking, complaining, lack-of-motivation learning style. It takes me one semester to come to realisation how University is teaching the students.. how I should be learning. My sister keeps telling me " It's no longer foundation " whenever I complain of the lack of care my tutors have for their students. The reality just slapped me hard.. and I am still NOT in consciousness.

I hate the fact that I have been in lack of motivation these past couple of months. Each day that has passed I remind myself to spend time productively, yet I still prioritise anything else but my studies.. and the cycle is repeating. It aches me how I have failed to bring back my hibernating curiosity and the time that has been wasted for nothing.

However, I hope I learn through all these. There's nothing more valuable than the lessons coming after awful experience. I am crossing my fingers for a better day tomorrow. For the realisation of the beauty of working hard, for having motivations and goals, for the happy productive me. xxx

Novel review: Fifty Shades

I've just turned after the last page of the trilogy of Fifty Shades.

Summary
Basically it is an erotic (yes you read it right) romance novel focusing on the world of a college graduate, Anastasia Steele, and a to-die-for CEO with a dark past, Christian Grey. By to-die-for I mean, gorgeously beautiful, HOT, rich as hell heaven, and young, looking at his achievement. 
Grey has always indulged in BDSM relationship - Dominant-submissive one. He's a control freak for one minute, tender and loving another... fifty shades in total. (This is where the title derives from)
Steele, on the other hand, is the innocent, shy, bright, courageous young lady who has captured Grey's heart the first step she enters Grey's office to interview him.

Long story short, the first trilogy, Fifty Shades of Grey focusing mainly on the issue whether Anastasia could accept the relationship Christian's offering her, considering her very minimal relationship experience.. the BDSM. This includes Christian's frustrations on how he can't -for once in his life- control a thing he wants, unlike his previous submissive. The second trilogy Fifty Shades of Darker reveals more of Christian's past. His ex-submissive, past dominant (yes he's been a submissive once in his life), conflicts on his and Ana's personalities and perceptions on relationship.. and life. Third and probably final of the trilogy, Fifty Shades of Freed focuses on their lives after marriage (oops, mind a bit spoiling here :p ). 

Review

The best remark on this novel is probably how I managed to finish THREE novels in 2 weeks time. This amazes me since I could barely finish a novel in one week, in general. A reason could be because I read the e-book version which is more handy, practical, and attempting(?) 

The Columbus Dispatch also criticised the book but stated that, "Despite the clunky prose, James does cause one to turn the page."*

This, I can't agree more. Despite the coarse language, this trilogy is an interesting piece of work. I love how the depiction of Christian Grey and Anastasia Steele seem so real, yet so unreal. Real in terms it may possibly happen (or have happened) in our life, in reality now. Yet so unreal because it's so far from the world which I revolve in right now. The whole sensual, erotic relationship I can only imagine many ( or even most) of the bules - Westerners - could be in. I know I may be so wrong, but well that's why I say it's far from my world. 
However the kind of romance they are having is heart-throbbing. It's as though they are made for each other- match-made from heaven I'd say. 

This novel has kept me thinking of the thousand opportunities money and wealth can bring,  the once-a-lifetime-make-it-happen ambition. The dreams that have the chance to come true. I think I'm confusing you with my description here but you probably know the idea. ;)

Overalls, I would say this novel has successfully kicked out the boredom in my 'lifeless' life right now.. at least keep me company ( thinking) for some moment. It's refreshing, exciting, thrilling, dirty, and um educating? Haha not the kind of word people would use I know. I guess it's realistic topic to touch on since it's going to be a part (sometimes even major) in marriage live. So it won't be so guilty if we can be more open-minded about the language, and mind our imagination. :D



* quoted from Wikipedia.en.org

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 in fun reading, refreshing, thrilling.